FIVE Social-EmotionaL Tips for All

Five tips to begin incorporating the five core competencies of SEL. :

Whether a teacher, student, or parent, there are benefits to actively integrating SEL practices into our daily lives. As a reminder, SEL (Social Emotional Learning) is defined as “how we manage and understand our emotions while responding to the world around us. This includes how we process empathy and maintain healthy relationships" (Luminex, 2021). With SEL, we understand that the cognitive load decreases for students and adults if their basic or emotional needs are left unmet. 

While we use SEL to facilitate learning, we also have to be fair to ourselves when implementing this learning theory (making room to practice what we teach in our own lives). 

With that in mind, here are five tips in alignment with the five core competencies of SEL, which are self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship skills, and responsible decision-making that you can implement yourself and encourage. 

Competency #1: Self-Awareness - The ability to identify your thoughts, emotions, and values and how it influences your behavior and perception of self. 

Tip: Work on actively being present with yourself and with others. Presence gives room to identify your needs and provides others with the comfort to do it for themselves. While many parts of life can take us away from being present such as work or other responsibilities, structured time to be present with yourself, your children, or your students can create intentional time for joy through group activities or reflective moments.  

Competency #2: Self-Management- Managing and regulating emotions and behavioral responses in various conditions and circumstances. 

 Tip: Establish and respect boundaries. We often talk about boundaries, but sometimes the hard part is creating them. Self-awareness is a prerequisite to self-management. What do you need? What makes you feel safe? How do you desire to be treated? And also make room for children and students to identify and create those things for themselves. And RESPECT it. Have you ever considered the concept of children having boundaries is foreign because we grew up believing that autonomy was earned by age, financial independence, and respect? 

Pro-tip: Children identifying, clarifying, or establishing their boundaries is not disrespectful. It only feels like it because it can trigger the resentment of our younger selves. Not everyone has to go through what you went through to be valid. And kids know it too. 

Competency #3: Social Awareness - The ability to consider and empathize with alternative cultures, perspectives, and life experiences, to understand and respect various cultural and social norms.

Tip: The active practice of empathy. By making efforts to understand the culture, the experiences, and the livelihood of those around us. This is a lifelong tip. Read a book or healthily talk to someone with an opposing view, or if you are not as culturally sensitive or knowledgeable, research for yourself. We can not continue to burden others with our ignorance. Empathy is a muscle. Put in the work. 

Competency #4: Relationship Skills - The ability to communicate and collaborate in order to create and maintain healthy relationships. 

 Tip: Identify a relationship in your life you want to develop. It can be a person or even a concept. Once identified, in what ways can you communicate or respond better? Are you genuinely processing someone or something you don't understand or tolerating it? - How we relate to people is not far from how to relate to beliefs and concepts. Always remember children reflect what we demonstrate. 

Competency #5: Responsible Decision-Making - The ability to make responsible, respectful, and conscious decisions about personal and social behaviors, including considering consequences and long-term outcomes.

Tip: Create a process or framework for decision-making. This can be personal and collaborative with your children or students. A suggested framework is ICED: Identifying the problem, Creating alternatives, Evaluating the alternatives, and Deciding on the best solution. When there are opportunities for collaborative decisions, take them. You never know what wisdom our young ones hold until you value them as a part of the process.

Resources:

Collaborative for Academic, Social, and Emotional Learning. (2022). What Does the Research Say? Retrieved on March 8th, 2022 

Landmark School Outreach. (2022) Responsible Decision Making (SEL). Retrieved May 6th, 2022.

Luminex. (2021). What is Social-Emotional Learning? Retrieved on February 1, 2022 

Minnesota Department of Education. (2022). Social Awareness. Retrieved on May 6th, 2022

Merriam-Webster. (2022). Self-Awareness. Retrieved on May 6th, 2022.

Merriam-Webster. (2022). Self-Management. Retrieved on May 6th, 2022.

Morgan, K. (2018). Decision-Making Activities for Teens. Retrieved on May 6th, 2022